I told a friend that adoption has taught me more about real love than anything else in my life. After some thought, I think the better way to say it would be, Adoption has given me another lesson in real love.
It started with my parents. They showed me what love looked like and introduced me to the Author. My siblings and friends gave me opportunities to practice. The first big test came with marriage, after the honeymoon fever wore off. Then came the babies, although it was the toddlers that made the lesson come alive (I've often said motherhood has made me realize my need for a Savior like nothing else!).
Each step in the process has been an experience in letting go of what I want for the good of someone else; pushing my selfishness into a new or different light, to be surrendered and changed into something better by a power greater than my own.
Many times I have taken one step forward followed by five steps back, choosing instead to hold on to the selfishness and allow it to fester. In spite of this, when I look back over the years I do see growth (thankfully!!).
The last nine months have been another time of growth. Adopting a toddler has been harder than I thought it would be. Bonding (on my side) has not happened automatically like it seems to for others. It has been a process. One that we are still working through.
Over the last few months I have been learning, once again, a lesson in love.
The Bible says Love is Patient and Kind. It does not say Love feels this way, but that it is.
When I feel impatient, I can still show love by choosing to be patient, no matter what I feel.
I wish it were as easy to carry out as it is to write, but true love does not come naturally. It is given to us by our Savior and through His Spirit we are empowered to act.
I am learning how much I need His power in my life and I am learning to ask for that power more frequently. It has not been an easy process. I have not liked the way I've acted along the way. But I am so thankful for the lesson.
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a
It started with my parents. They showed me what love looked like and introduced me to the Author. My siblings and friends gave me opportunities to practice. The first big test came with marriage, after the honeymoon fever wore off. Then came the babies, although it was the toddlers that made the lesson come alive (I've often said motherhood has made me realize my need for a Savior like nothing else!).
Each step in the process has been an experience in letting go of what I want for the good of someone else; pushing my selfishness into a new or different light, to be surrendered and changed into something better by a power greater than my own.
Many times I have taken one step forward followed by five steps back, choosing instead to hold on to the selfishness and allow it to fester. In spite of this, when I look back over the years I do see growth (thankfully!!).
The last nine months have been another time of growth. Adopting a toddler has been harder than I thought it would be. Bonding (on my side) has not happened automatically like it seems to for others. It has been a process. One that we are still working through.
Over the last few months I have been learning, once again, a lesson in love.
The Bible says Love is Patient and Kind. It does not say Love feels this way, but that it is.
When I feel impatient, I can still show love by choosing to be patient, no matter what I feel.
I wish it were as easy to carry out as it is to write, but true love does not come naturally. It is given to us by our Savior and through His Spirit we are empowered to act.
I am learning how much I need His power in my life and I am learning to ask for that power more frequently. It has not been an easy process. I have not liked the way I've acted along the way. But I am so thankful for the lesson.
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a
4 comments:
"I am learning how much I need His power in my life and I am learning to ask for that power more frequently. It has not been an easy process. I have not liked the way I've acted along the way."
Oh how I relate to this paragraph, Megan! So glad you added the final sentence! That's the part I so often forget...giving thanks in the struggle.
what a good word today Megan! thanks
"When I feel impatient, I can still show love by choosing to be patient, no matter what I feel."
I wrote this on a post it and put it on my bathroom mirror, as I need reminded of this often in these challenging toddler years. Thank you for the words!
Stacy
I totally agree! It's hard to love in action when you don't feel it. I've prayed countless times for the Lord's help in that area since we've adopted!
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