I have to say, the further I get into this adoption process, the less scared I feel.
Don't get me wrong, I still have my moments. But even in the midst of the moments when I think, "What in the world are we doing?" "Are we crazy?!" "Will I love this child?", I have a peace deep down. It calms me and reminds me that God knows what we are doing, we are not crazy and yes, we will love this child.
In fact, I already do.
The love and excitement I feel for this little girl who has probably not been born, is nothing short of a miracle. It is a work of God.
I have a feeling it may be even more miraculous once we have our little girl home and real life sets in.
It is easy to be in love with the idea of adoption and a little girl I have not yet met. After all, what's not to love? But once she is home and throws tantrums and has sleepless nights will she still be as easy to love? What if we don't bond quickly? Will she still be as easy to love?
That is when the miracle of love will become obvious. It may not appear as a feeling (feelings come and go), but we are committed to loving this little girl. She is ours. She was meant to be a part of our family. We are not complete without her.
I know God will continue to strengthen my love for this child that I have never met throughout this crazy adoption process. I know he won't stop strengthening that bond once we have her home.
He is, after all, the creator of love. I think He can do it!
4 comments:
He WILL do it!! Isn't it amazing. We serve an awesome and sovereign God. He is tickled pink with joy over the fact that you and Kory will be welcoming another one of His precious children into your home. Isn't this the best place to be with God - bent completely for Him!?! Megan, I can't wait to hear more!! You are so lucky and blessed.
i think you have such a good, realistic view of love. that despite feelings that fluctuate, your commitment and devotion are love to the little girl that will be your someday. love you,
shar
Beutiful post! You will be amazed how much you love that little girl!! And you're right about the committment part of it too. :)
I'm finding it so interesting following your adoption journey. I do have some questions though - you may have answered them in posts I haven't read, so sorry if you have. Have you chosen a country to recieve your daughter from? What does the adoption process involve - obviously lots of paper work - how long from the initial to you recieve your child?
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